Can't think of a better title at the moment, tho I like posting it like this. It's raw, at par with my momentary emotions instead of how I would want people to see me as instead. Anyway this post isn't about how I name my posts (later on you'll learn the reason for the title though). This is really about how I appreciate and value Helen and Butch's trust on me as their only middle child. To give you guys a bit of a background/context as to how things run in our family, let me start by telling you that at 23 years old, with a stable job I still live with my parents ergo they still feed me, pay for most of the bills and takes care of me--basically. Here in the Philippines such a situation isn't taboo but is very much a huge reality. That is not to say that I don't help out with the expenses (pa disclaimer lang po haha).
I would want to move out someday but right now I still very much enjoy the TLC, joy and emotional stability that my parents are able to extend to me and my siblings.
Yesterday, at 2:14 in the morning I was en route to gahd knows where with people I am not close with at all. I didn't exactly know where we were heading to yet that feeling of a mixture of anxiety and excitement appealed to me very much and I thought to myself how very fortunate I am. I was raised by my parents to make strong decisions for myself and believe in them. I am aware though that from the situation that I'm presenting you right now it doesn't seem like I made the wisest choice. I was merely trying to make you understand the emotions going through me then while we're speeding through Highway 54, whilst the street lights reflects and dims on my face. I contemplated how very blessed I am for I was allowed to make decisions on my own. How lucky I am that I wasn't dictated to do this and that because they don't trust my judgement. How blessed I am to be I allowed to go out whenever I want, go to places, book a flight on my own, went and climb a mountain without me begging them to allow me. I am very happy to be able to experience all this because they trust me. I can only hope that I can also pass along such trust, leniency to my children. When the time comes, these "2am"moments are the ones that I'd get back to and maybe base my decisions on.
I would want to move out someday but right now I still very much enjoy the TLC, joy and emotional stability that my parents are able to extend to me and my siblings.
Yesterday, at 2:14 in the morning I was en route to gahd knows where with people I am not close with at all. I didn't exactly know where we were heading to yet that feeling of a mixture of anxiety and excitement appealed to me very much and I thought to myself how very fortunate I am. I was raised by my parents to make strong decisions for myself and believe in them. I am aware though that from the situation that I'm presenting you right now it doesn't seem like I made the wisest choice. I was merely trying to make you understand the emotions going through me then while we're speeding through Highway 54, whilst the street lights reflects and dims on my face. I contemplated how very blessed I am for I was allowed to make decisions on my own. How lucky I am that I wasn't dictated to do this and that because they don't trust my judgement. How blessed I am to be I allowed to go out whenever I want, go to places, book a flight on my own, went and climb a mountain without me begging them to allow me. I am very happy to be able to experience all this because they trust me. I can only hope that I can also pass along such trust, leniency to my children. When the time comes, these "2am"moments are the ones that I'd get back to and maybe base my decisions on.
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